May 4, 2009

She's just a small town girl... living in a lonely world...

The mental entropy wrought by my new neighbors is my official excuse for blogging absence. That along with a small amount of translation work that finally fell my way in the form of insurance liability contracts – a process that went something like:

Portuguese legalese > Portuguese plain speak > English plain speak > English quasi-legalese.

I’m not that juridically versed, so I kind of had to fake the last part. Actually, unlike most translations I do, I was more concerned with making sure that the final version didn’t have fluid sentence structures. I figured, that if it read like a garble of pretension, then it must be an accurate sounding insurance contract.

Here’s a short list of a few things I've discovered since we last spoke:

1. My husband has a most revolting way of eating bananas. I was reading in bed the other night when he flopped down next to me and turned the tv on. I looked over and saw that he was eating a peeled banana like it was corn on the cob. The horror! How have we made it through 8 years of marriage with this disgusting habit going undetected?

2. No matter how much we need to be a two-income family, I am not taking a job in Brazil as a janitor. Finding work in Brazil is not easy. I didn’t expect it would be. But when a private high school that I had given my resume to some time ago called me up for an interview, I assumed it was for a coordinator position, not for a maintenance supervisor. I politely said, thanks but no thanks. C has taken to calling me the toilet washer (“lavador de privadas”).

3. Crickets are not good luck when found in the pant leg of your pajamas. Especially when wearing said pajamas.

4. Trying to outdo your inconsiderate 80’s music loving neighbors with a battle of the bands style showdown involving a medley of your own personal renditions of Journey and Queen's greatest hits is fruitless. No matter how loud you can sing, they will still be more annoying than you.

5. The interim director of the WHO has a most unfortunate last name. Especially if you're into mashups, speak English and Portuguese, and have an adolescent sense of humor. (I’m keeping my blog g rated, so I’ll let you figure that one out on your own.)

6. And finally, when the temperatures drop into the 50’s at night in an unheated house, rules get broken and the dog gets special privileges.

Cold morning

(Actually, we’ve been fighting over her.)


Danielle said...

Who is the interim director of the WHO!?! I can't find any names except for Margaret Chan, and I don't see any joke there. I WANT TO KNOW THE JOOOKKEEEE!

The picture is adorable. It's cooling down here, too, but I still can't convince Alexandre to let the cat sleep in the bedroom, mostly because she pesters for attention all night, and if you roll over to ignore her, she bites your feet.

Danielle said...

Do you mean the CDC? Besser? I still don't get it!

lovelydharma said...

I guess his official title is "the assistant director general for health security and environment ad interim" - but I kept hearing his name splashed across the news as Interim Director.

tee hee...

Betty said...

Isn´t she the cutest dog! I would let her in my bed too! :)
I hope you find a job soon. At least then you won´t have to listen to your neighbors all the time!

Rachel said...

Robyn, that thing about the job as janitor is so funny you gotta laugh. It will be funnier in retrospect, perhaps. In all fairness, job hunting back in the us of a isn't so fun either--but at least i have some non-janitorial leads! good luck with your search :)

Danielle said...

oh, ok! I see the appeal of the last name. I've seen it recently but I didn't make the connection because I had a boss with that last name once so it's old hat for me.

But, I, too, have the sense of humor of a 12-year-old boy. It's the best way to entertain myself when I teach English and have to listen to English mistakes all day. Just yesterday, a girl was trying to say "gentil" but she said "My boss is very gentle." I had fun with that.

Lindsey said...

Hey Lovely Dharma,

I understand you on the no time for blogging comment. I feel like sometimes with the slow internet and the laziness, it´s just too much work to post. I´m trying to be better this month. Congrats on the translation work. How do you find work like that? Do you advertise? About is complicated here in Brazil, I imagine that Minas is more difficult than here in SP. Have you thought about teaching English privatley? I started in a school and now I work almost full time in my own room teaching private students - the pay is decent and the hours are flexible. It´s boring at times but a good job for the interim.

Keep up the posts!

Mallory Elise said...

wow that's a beautiful bed...i want it. where did ya get it? i'll drive :P

bet janitor made more than R$6 per hour though...i just came back from an interview at a private "school" which turned out to be a daycare...yeah. i laughed and said goodbye ;)